There’s no doubt, relationships can definitely be tricky at times. This is especially true when it comes to the relationship between a man and a woman. You might have a girlfriend who seems like she’s fine one minute, then angry the next; this can be perplexing. Perhaps you’re the woman in the relationship and you can’t understand why your husband or significant other won’t help around the house or seems to be glued to every sporting event on television, even when there are chores that need to be done.
The problem with these relationships is simply that you’re dealing with people who can be very different from one another. For example, if the guy likes to watch sports and he has a wife who is just as enthusiastic about watching the game, chances are they aren’t going to have many squabbles in this area. However, if he has a wife who doesn’t follow sports, she might find it annoying that her husband isn’t helping with the housework or the kids, and it can cause friction.
Of course, there’s no reason why you both have to enjoy the same things. In fact, that can sometimes be a bit boring. However, it is important that you try and understand the other person’s viewpoint and that you work together to come up with a reasonable compromise on how you’re going to handle these challenging areas.
Compromise is one of those things that can help create harmony and make your relationships with your spouse, family, co-workers, and neighbors so much more enjoyable. Nobody likes to constantly be in a situation where they feel like they’re being criticized; but, likewise, who wants to always feel like things are only about the other person? Communication and compromise will be key factors in being able to resolve almost every issue that arises in your relationships with others.
One thing that has helped many couples is to have a date night. While this might seem silly if you’ve been together for many years, you’d be surprised how much it can do to help both of you reconnect. It’s easy to fall into a rut, which is often exactly the thing that makes your partner begin to feel like they’re being taken for granted. A special date night gives you each an opportunity to concentrate on each other. This is a perfect time to just relax, get away from the troubles of the day, and simply enjoy being together.
Of course, you should also make time when you need to talk about serious issues. This should never be during your date night, that needs to be reserved for enjoying your relationship and working on building the bond between you and your partner. Rather, set aside time, when necessary, to discuss important issues. If you’re bothered by having to do all of the housework or shopping, then discuss it at a time when you’re both committed to resolving these issues. It shouldn’t be an attack on your partner, just a discussion regarding how you are feeling. Most experts recommend that you stick to “I” statements. If you are using “I” statements, you won’t be criticizing your partner or pointing out the flaws you see in them.
It’s important to not only broach these conversations carefully and with a good heart, but you should also be willing to listen just as carefully. If your partner has an issue they would like to discuss, don’t become defensive. Try to hear what they are saying and understand the situation from their perspective. It can be easy to fly off the handle and start objecting to what’s being said. In fact, it’s human nature to want to defend yourself; but, once you move into a defensive attitude, it can be hard for there to be any good communication.
A loving relationship relies on both give and take. You need to have confidence that your partner is not trying to sabotage you. Perhaps they’ve been a bit neglectful, but it’s probably not because they don’t like you. Maybe they’re stressed at work, worried about an aging parent, or concerned that the kids are not doing well in school. Give them the benefit of the doubt and work together to start learning how to communicate with each other effect.